Making 10-Year-Old Me Proud

You know what? I miss being 10-years-old playing football with my friends at the park. I miss being in the 5th grade and going out to recess everyday to play kickball (and actually getting pretty damn good at it). I miss hopping on my bike and disappearing for the day, going on mini adventures, always trying to discover something new. I tried to remember the last time I actually played and I can’t. I don’t play anymore. Somewhere along the road, the definition of ‘fun’ changed. It stopped being playing soccer with your friends and exploring the woods and it started being stuff like getting drunk or staring at each other in the club. Now don’t get me wrong, some things will always be considered fun (like swimming, cookouts and evening visits to the bookstore), but at some point, I stopped chasing pure fun and adventure and not that deep down inside, I yearn for it daily.

Back in the MySpace days, people would often post these corny quotes like the one below about growing up. I would brush them off and think to myself, “yeah get over it. Life changes, oh well.”

“Lollipops turn into cigarettes. The innocent ones turn into sluts. Homework goes in the trash. Mobile phones are being used in class. Detention becomes suspension. Soda becomes vodka. Bikes become cars. Kisses turn into sex. Remember when getting high meant swinging on the playground? When protection meant wearing a helmet? When the worst things you could get from boys were cooties? Dad’s shoulders were the highest place on earth and mum was your hero? Your worst enemies were your siblings. Race issues were about who ran the fastest. War was only a card game. And the only drug you knew was cough medicine. When wearing a skirt didn’t make you a slut. The most pain you felt was when you skinned your knees, and goodbyes only meant until tomorrow? And we couldn’t wait to grow up.”

But when I think about it, I realize how much life really has changed. I love being an adult, I do, but I also understand why some other people don’t. More responsibilities means less time for fun- which, to be honest, is what life is all about. I wanted money so I got a job and had to work. I started worrying about my grades, graduating high school and getting into a good college. Then, I worried about paying bills and now, I’m focused (I don’t say worry anymore, it’s like praying for something bad to happen) on graduating college and what I’m going to do afterwards. Throughout all this, I’ve forgotten about what’s truly important in life. I only do things that “benefit” school, my wallet or my future and tell myself that I don’t have time for anything else.

The other day I was hanging out with some friends. We’ve been planning a super fun summer event (their idea not mine). We decided to stop by the park where we’re holding it at to scope out the location and hash out some of the details. As soon as we got there, before we talked any business, some of my guy friends made it a point to play a quick game of basketball at one of the basketball courts. A part of me was thinking to myself, “this is great and all, but we should really start planning the event,” but I didn’t say anything because I knew how much fun they were having. I had to remind myself to not take everything so seriously, not everything has to be planned. After the game finished, we went on to have a really productive and enjoyable meeting. What I’m getting at is there’s always time for fun. Not everything has to be so damn serious, in fact, few things do. I admire my friends for being so easy going that they are able to kick back and make time for fun despite having other obligations and not letting those obligations weigh them down. (On a side note: I wonder if it’s easier for men to make time for fun then it is females.) It seems like everybody is on the fast track to get old and die. And because I have a bad habit of occasionally following societal norms, so am I. Therefore, I’m going to try my hardest to change that. This weekend, I’m going out on a adventure. I don’t know where I’m going or what I’m doing, but I’m bringing my camera, getting lost and discovering something new.